The other part is to help you stop acting like a dumbass.

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So in my time as a photographer, I often run into scenarios where I’m either:

1.  Already booked on a date that someone has inquired

2.  Out of the price range of a prospective client.

In both of these situations, I want to help everyone as best I can and create a symbiotic relationship so everyone wins.  The client gets a quality photographer, the photographer gets new work, and I get to retain good customer service by connecting the two.  WIN WIN WIN.

However, I can’t begin to tell you the amount of stress that I’ve gone through in trying to find reliable photographers that I feel comfortable referring.  Like it or not, whoever you vouch for is an extension of your brand – and how they perform is a reflection on YOU!

So with that – I try to find photographers that I can stand behind and feel comfortable referring on a regular basis.  (Some might not know this, but I actually follow-up with those potential clients to find out how the experience was.)

If the photographer messes up, it’s a hard conversation to have to tell them what they need to work on.  A lot of times they take things personal, and it’s really unnecessary drama that I don’t really need.  Especially considering that I’m the one offering them work.  So most often now, I’ll just stop referring work without telling them why – and move on to another photographer.  (Or if it’s in an inquiry for an area of photography where I don’t know anyone that excels, I hate to say this…but I’ll actually just respond with a “sorry but I’m not available email” instead of referring them to a photographer that has shitty work/service.

I decided to create this post for my future/past 2nd’s to consider, and also to communicate my expectations for my referral circle – so that everyone can be on the same page.

(PS – if you’re a photographer who used to receive a lot of work from me and is now reading this, I will gladly explain why I don’t refer to you anymore – AS LONG AS YOU DON’T TAKE IT PERSONAL.  Sorry for yelling, but it just seems ass-backwards for someone to get upset at someone that’s trying to give them work.)

13 Reasons you’re cutting yourself short from getting more business

1.  Ego – I can’t even believe that I have to include this as it’s so ridiculous - but it’s also the most prevalent.  A photographer will communicate with the client in a way that comes across as pretentious or as if they wont take direction.  While you may very well know which shot may look better, or if the client suggests an idea that may not be the best…it’s important to make them feel like you’re on the same team.  Never come across arrogant.

2.  Ego (again) - However this time I’m referring to 2nd shooters at weddings.  1st shooter makes the call.  You listen.  That should be enough said already – but I’ll elaborate because I like you.  Don’t ever question the 1st shooters ideas/techniques (ESPECIALLY in front of the bride and groom) – and if you’re to make suggestions, do so in private and don’t come across as if you “know it all”.  Ideally, you want to bring it up so it comes across as if it were THEIR idea in the first place.  I know you want to show them how great you are, but the best way of doing so is to find what it is they particularly want out of you – and FOCUS ON THAT!  You can bet your ass you’ll be hired again, and maybe even referred a wedding that’s under their price range.

3.  Bad Product – This really should have been first, but it’s really a given.  A big lesson I’ve learned is not to judge a 2nd shooter’s ability by their portfolio.  Or ANY photographer at that.  While they may have some awesome shots on there – it’s more important to see consistency.  I’ve recommended photographers in the past that I thought were on top of their game, only to find out that they weren’t quite there yet – and were most likely just using some “lucky” shots on their portfolios.  Don’t be offended if I ask to see a few complete galleries or full weddings that you’ve shot.

4.  Bad Service – It’s like getting the wind knocked out of you when you hear that someone you referred has taken months to deliver someone’s images.  I vouched for you!  It’s like the scene in Tony Montana when he fails to kill the mark.  Sosa tells him “there’s not going to be a next time”.  And look what happened.  Point is, I’m going to expect reasonable turn-around, and reasonable communication.  Be professional on the phone, don’t answer just waking up at 11 AM, and don’t answer in a crazy party.  Make sure they know you’re attentive and alert, and they have your full attention.

5.  Unprofessionalism online – If you’re doing any of the things listed in #1 on this post, I’m probably not going to refer you.  But that’s just me.  Others might be different, but I hold online presence to a high standard – and I’d be embarrassed if a client I referred found you online and you had some alarming personality traits that would cause a client to question your stability.

6.  Being socially awkward - If you’re quiet in person and can’t make clients comfortable around you - that’s a deal-breaker.  Like I mentioned above, referring you to my potential clients is an extension of my brand.  My brand is fun, upbeat, outgoing, and ON TOP OF IT.  Be comfortable in your own skin, and I’ll be comfortable referring you.

7.  Unwillingness to try something new – I’ll actually use a specific time in the past for this one, since I still refer him.  About 6 months ago, I asked my friend Mark if he’d be down to shoot a PR event (awards ceremony/speakers/grip & grin) and he felt he wasn’t equipped for it.  I knew that he had the gear, he was just worried that he wouldn’t be able to get the right images.  I have no doubt in my mind that he would have done great, but he didn’t think so.  And often times I’ve been completely willing to bring them along on one of my events so that they’re comfortable with expectations – and THEY’RE STILL SCARED.  So in the end, their fear has gotten the best of them, and have missed out on growing and gaining more work as a result.  Their loss.

8.  Being a pain in the ass – I’m guessing this one is going to be bias on my end, but I really don’t prefer working with people who stress me out.  You’ll get paid.  Rest assured.  But if you’re constantly bugging me about $50 or something insignificant like the cost of valet at an event you shot for me, I’m going to remember it.  I haven’t *not paid* a single photographer in my entire career.  It’s bad business.  But I also believe it’s bad business to leave a bad taste in someone’s mouth and be remembered as “the annoying one”.

9.  Bad Presentation – You don’t dress professional, you’re unkempt, or your breath stinks.  Okay, I know the last part was a little harsh – but it stems from an experience I had in a nightclub one time.  I was talking to another photographer who’s work I respected, and his breath was terrible (you have to talk close because the music is so loud).  It was so bad, that while I had intention of talking business with him, I was more eager to end the conversation so I could get away from him!  It’s silly to think that something that trivial could affect an entire relationship, but it did.  (From then on, I made sure to bring gum with me whenever shooting nightlife.)

10.  I don’t like you -  I’m a part of an online forum based in San Diego, and I’ve had conversations with photographers who’s work is GREAT – but they argue with me and take things personal.  And while I don’t doubt they’re on top of their game when it comes to their business…if I don’t like them – I’m not exactly excited to help them “win” in a symbiotic relationship.  I know, it’s messed up – but I’m being real.  Also, if we come from different backgrounds (age group, lifestyle, perspective on life) – odds are I won’t be inclined to bring you on as a 2nd.  I like to vibe well with who I shoot with, as I just feel it helps the energy gain momentum and the process of the day flow smoothly.

11.  Price point – This is an essential factor, but one that’s expected.  To help ensure I’m sending you the right leads, if you change your pricing or just want me to be familiar with your costs, I’d love it if you would send me an info sheet.  I don’t want to mismatch clients with photographers outside their range – in the same way I don’t want to refer gigs to photographers under what they’d be willing to accept.  While this one isn’t surprising, it’s definitely one to consider.  And flexibility is always a benefit, as I’ll be more inclined to send more referrals your way.

12.  Style – Another given, but it’s important to make the distinction that it’s not something personal.  You might be a GREAT portrait photographer, but I’m looking for someone more photojournalistic and familiar with candids.  Nothing wrong with that, just not the right fit.  My friend Brett reminded me of this point, thanks man!

13. Biting business – This applies to both referrals AND 2nd shooters.  What an idiotic thing to do…bite the hand that feeds you!  There’s a certain photographer that I specifically wont refer to even though he is great at photography because he has a reputation for stealing clients, and never referring out.  When it comes to 2nd shooters – NEVER EVER EVER pass out your own business card when associate shooting or 2nd shooting.  This shouldn’t even have to be written – and it’s really unfortunate that people do this.

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6 Reasons that Cause Me to Keep Referring to You!

1.  Awesome personality - My roommate has told me he’d hire someone that has a better personality but not as good quality of photos for 2nd shooting a wedding merely for the effect that their energy has on the day.  Pretty crazy huh?  Well, I agree.  Although I’m VERY picky with who I choose to come on board, so both better be on point.  I’ve got about 3-4 guys that I love working with regularly, and I’m so stoked that I’ve connected with them.

2.  Make it easy as possible for me - A 2nd shooter of mine in San Francisco arrived with coffee in hand when she met me to shoot a wedding last year, and it made a big impression!  I love things like that, and when a photographer makes the process ‘enjoyable’ rather than just ‘good’, it goes a long way.  That goes with payment too.  Accept Square?  Awesome.  Paypal?  Even better!

3.  Create amazing images I wouldn’t recognize on my own - This is actually a big factor in my thought process to hire 2nd photographers.  I’ll pay a higher price point for someone as experienced as myself or MORE experienced so that I can be assured good imagery from them.  If they impress me and show me something that fits with my brand but is something I’ve yet to try out – they’re “IN.”  Mark (who I mentioned above) really wowed me with some images at a wedding we shot last year, which led me to book him as my 2nd photographer for a Cabo wedding that I have this year.

4.  Being flexible in price, or willing to invest in themselves or ‘our relationship’ - There are times when I’m doing a shoot that I don’t necessarily have a budget for an additional shooter, but recognize that there would be a ton of value in bringing one on.  As I’ve done with some consistent clients, I really appreciate it when photographers will just opt to “help out” without worrying about payment.  Sometimes you have to take a step back, think about how much business someone is bringing you – and show them you appreciate it.  *Take note*

5.  Returning the favor - Another illusive obvious – but when someone regularly refers me work – I always think about what gigs I can send them to help them out.  I referred about 5-6 weddings to a photographer last year with no reciprocation.  Well, guess what…my referral circle has now changed.

6.  Going above and beyond when 2nd shooting - My friend Jeff Youngren wrote a great post about ALL of this kind of stuff, and really – he hits the nail right on the head.  Check it out if you wanna learn how to get in a photographer’s good graces.

If you got a lot out of this post, and think other photographers can get value out of it as well, I’d be stoked if you shared this.  And as always – love/hate mail is always welcomed in the comments below, would be glad to talk about any of these topics with you!

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(PS – this photo above is of my friend Jason Kirby when we were making our ridiculous holiday christmas card portraits last year.  And so you know – Jason currently gets a good portion of my on-site printing corporate clients.  He avoids all 13 points mentioned above very well, and I’m happy to refer him business.)

I chose Craig because of the lifestyle he’s created for himself, and the kind of freedom he expresses in his online social media.  A lot of people worry about what employers might think about certain posts or whether it might affect client relationships – however Craig expresses a personality purely candid, and honest.  While he’s not a crazy partier getting drunk every night, he post photos of fun celebrations during nights out with friends, adventures to burning man, and some pretty personal sentiments from his private life.  It’s refreshing to see that kind of candor, and I’m happy to have him featured on today’s interview.

We met up during my recent trip to NYC, and the interview took place at a French Restaurant L’Ecole in his neighborhood on the lower east side of Manhattan.

Here’s an image to give you a visual for the conversation taking place.

What is your name/age?

Craig Clemens – 33

What is your occupation?

I’m a partner in a digital marketing company in which I am the copywriter. That means I write the sales and marketing material that gets people to invest in our products

Where did you grow up?

Thousand Oaks, CA

How long have you been doing what you currently do?

I started off in sales when I was 21, and bounced around various boilerroom-esq phone sales jobs – mortgage broker, I sold credit card merchant accounts, Direct TV, you name it.

Then I found myself 24 years old living in San Diego broke as a joke. I remember one month I had to sell my TV for $50 to make rent, and I used to go to McDonalds with coupons to get the $1 off the value meal for lunch.

But I had a friend, his name was Eben, and he had just written a book on how to meet women that he was selling online as an “eBook”. It was called, “Double Your Dating” and he was doing really well with it. Like REALLY freakin well. I told him I wanted to come to work for him doing ANYTHING to figure out how he was making so much money. I think he was pulling in 70K a month at this time. But he didn’t see a place where I would fit in.

One of the parts of his business was an email newsletter where he would write dating tips. He told me every time he would send out a newsletter he would make 4K in sales. I got on the list and started reading them and thought, “I can write this stuff”… so I wrote one and sent it to him. I hoped he would like it and offer me 10% – $400 – to write them for him. If remember thinking if he said yes and I could write one a week that would be life-changing money!

We get on the phone and he does offer me a job… but FULL TIME and at 3K a month. That was a lot of money for my broke McDonald’s eating ass at the time and I was STOKED.

I started off with him working as a customer service-response team member, and managing the affiliate program. Eventually I got into buying media and other various things – I probably did 5 or 6 different things before I found my sweet spot – writing the sales copy.

Eben had been writing all the sales copy himself at the time – as converting eyes to buyers is critical to a new business. But as he created more and more products – an online dating program, a program for women on how to land a great man called, “Catch Him & Keep Him”, etc – the company needed more writing firepower, so he began training me.

After about 6 months of training, listening to marketing experts while I drove everywhere in my car, and studying what the experts wrote, and writing a whole lot of TERRIBLE copy, I finally got to the point where I could write something Eben thought was good enough to send to the mailing list.

The first thing I wrote got sent out to over a million people, and it was the most exciting thing ever hitting “refresh” and watching the sales in our shopping cart increase.

Soon Eben and I were working as a team, creating all the copy together. Eventually the business grew to 20 million a year… with 80 employees and they were all virtual.  They all had the ability to travel if they wanted so long as they achieved RESULTS, which everyone of course loved. We all worked really hard yet still had great lifestyles – it was an exciting time and I’ll always be thankful for the experience.

While some of the other positions in that company – if you were working for a more traditional firm, usually do require you to be in an office, copywriting is one where if you are good you can set your own terms. Most companies won’t care so long as you are consistently producing awesome stuff. So it’s worth it to put the work in to become good.

Plus it’s recession-proof – every company needs sales so the demand for great writers stays high no matter what the economy. You may have to shift from selling yachts to selling economical cars, but there will always be companies needing your service! A great writer can charge 25K or more plus royalties for a single package and smart entrepreneurs will happily pay it… as they know the right sales letter can turn their idea into gold.

You mentioned you had another way you were making money online?

Yes, around 2006 my brother and I started an Affiliate Marketing company. Affiliate Marketing means marketing other people’s products on commission… so say someone has an Anti-Virus program they sell for $50. If I send them a customer who buys it, they will gladly pay me a commission out of that… usually 50-75%. So you are essentially an online traffic broker.

Back in the day this was very easy. I remember my first month doing this I made $330, and thinking that now I could eat Baja Fresh every day for lunch instead of McDonald’s just on that money alone!

In those days we were buying keywords on Google and sending them directly to the merchant sites, which Google doesn’t allow any more. My brother Curt turned out to be a real genius at it and mostly due to his awesomeness this company soon started doing MASSIVE numbers. The best part with these campaigns is if you found a winner you could set it up and it would pretty much run itself… literally a money-making machine. So when Eben and I parted ways I shifted focus to that.

These days the game is very different, so if someone is looking to get into affiliate marketing I recommend trying SEO (getting free traffic) versus buying it. My friend Kelly Felix has an awesome course called www.BringTheFresh.com where he shows people how to do this, and some of his students are making very big money.

Did you have a 9-5 job before that?

All my sales jobs were commission aside from one.  But one of them definitely expected us to show up everyday.

I had a sales job for Direct TV that was pretty much 8-5 and that was terrible.  I remember walking out of that job feeling like so much of my day was gone.  Didn’t have enough energy to go to the gym afterwards, and if I did – my day was gone at that point.

What kind of business do you currently have now?

The Affiliate company lead to Curt and I forming a partnership with our other brother Mark and a 4^th business partner, Josh, where we started creating our own brands. We focus on men’s health and nutrition, and organic cosmetics for women. We have a beautiful office in Woodland Hills and are always hiring, so if someone is interested in learning marketing while working at an exciting company definitely have them get in touch with me. The parent company is called Golden Hippo Media and they can learn more at our website, www.GoldenHippoMedia.com

How much longer do you envision yourself working in the field that you’re in?

Forever.  I’ll always be doing some kind of marketing or consulting, for my own brands or others I find exciting.

What level of schooling have you completed?

Went to junior college for like a year and then dropped out.  My main schooling was driving around listening to the old marketing masters – there was a good 3 year period when I listened to ONLY marketing programs, never the radio. And learning from Eben – he’s one of the best copywriters in the game so getting to learn directly from him was invaluable.

What is it that you love about your work?

There’s a lot of different ways I could answer that question – we get 20-30 emails a day from customers telling us how our products have changed their lives.  Those are some of the most rewarding emails to read – where your job is really making a difference in someone’s life.

I’ve recognized some of our limited edition products while I’ve been out and that’s awesome to see.  Seeing something you’ve worked on to help develop or promote being used or consumed in public by someone you don’t know – that’s a pretty unique feeling.

I also love split-testing – putting 2 pieces of sales copy up and seeing which converts the best. It’s fascinating because it’s often NOT what you think! We do that on the internet all day and it’s fun and educational

What is your least favorite thing about your work?

You never really know what’s gonna win in a split-test.  No matter how much you study or how much research you do – you’re never know what’s gonna win.

I recently spent a good month writing what I thought was an incredible sales package for a new fitness product. I was pre-celebrating because I thought people were gonna love it… and it totally bombed.

Is there anything you miss about life back home? 

The thing I miss the most – is the bars closing at 2 am.  Several reasons – if you go out and have an enjoyable night, you’re in bed by 2:15.  In NYC, the bars really get going around 1…so if you’re going out – YOU’RE GOING OUT.  I guess that’s why I’m more of a homebody these days. 

What are some of the advantages of your job compared with the regular corporate career?

If you’re  a copywriter vs a corporate career, you have the opportunity to create a massive home run. One of my marketing mentors, Gary Bencivenga, bought a house in the Hamptons off the earnings of just ONE sales package he wrote! But as I mentioned earlier, sometimes you spend a few weeks writing something that bombs, so there is a trade-off, but you gotta love that home run potential. 

What are some of the disadvantages compared with the regular corporate career?

You’re directly responsible for your own income as far as finding clients, which some people have a hard time with. Also, if your clients aren’t making big money, it’s hard for you to make big money – which depends on their skills marketing and running their businesses, and many other factors besides the sales copy. So my advice for new writers coming up is to align yourself with a company that either already has big earnings (and knows the value of great copy – many don’t), or has great potential.

How different is the dating scene for you?  Is it easier/harder to make time to be with your significant other?

Way easier.  I can do an extended lunch date or take a long weekend off… I even ALMOST pulled off a long-distance relationship! (don’t try that at home). When it does become difficult though is when a girl has her own career that requires her to work crazy amounts of hours. A woman with her own thing going on is VERY attractive, but if she is putting in 50 hour weeks or can’t take vaca time, we can’t take as many trips as I would like, etc

Do you tend to prefer to live paycheck to paycheck or with a savings plan accounted for?  Is your income predictable and regular, or entirely dependent on what you produce?

I don’t ever gamble at casinos, but when it comes to income – I’d rather swing for the fences rather than have a steady income.  Even days when I was in commission sales – I was always geared on having a paycheck based off what I produced vs. how many hours I spent in the office.

Along these lines, I’m  currently looking to invest in small businesses, online or otherwise, that require up to 250K in start-up capital. Rather than investing in real estate or whatever I want to plant a few “seeds” this way in the hopes one blows up! So if any of your readers  have concepts they want to launch have them get in touch with me. Doesn’t have to be a new idea either (for example I want one of them to be a juice bar.)

I’m also a firm believer in investing in your own continued education. I still read at least one copywriting book a month and I recently started working with a $500 per hour executive coach who has helped me increase my productivity tremendously. When I was working for Eben, he paid $5000 for me to go to Gary Benivenga’s copywriting seminar. And that cost benefited him 10-fold in terms of the work that I produced after coming back.

Right now I’m re-reading the classic double-book, “My Life In Advertising” and “Scientific Advertising”, by Claude Hopkins. David Oglivy (founder of legendary ad agency Oglivy & Mather) says no one has any business being in advertising in any sense unless they’ve read it 7 times… well I’m on number 2! If you want to get started in copy writing – read those. You can probably find it in a free PDF download by Googling around, or just get on on amazon for 10 bucks or whatever. I’m having my whole company re-read it right now including my business partners and we are getting new nuggets of wisdom even though it’s written about marketing campaigns that are almost 100 years old! (Hopkins launched many famous brands like Pepsodent toothpaste, Goodyear tires, etc)

How do you imagine your retirement, or lifestyle past 60?

It’s funny – whenever my accountant calls and asks if I want to contribute to my IRA…”well shit – if I’m 59 years old and that little $49,000 of security means anything – that’ll be a bad sign.”  I don’t see myself ever totally retiring as I truly love writing and see myself doing it til my time here is done (though doing creative writing, not writing copy, that DOES get old!)

Do you see your career facilitating a lifestyle suitable for a family, or do you have the desire to have a family?

Yes and yes.

What are your top priorities in the ‘big picture’?

Everything combined.  It’s equally important to excel in all areas as I feel they all affect each other.  It all goes together – I always try to live a balanced lifestyle.  When I create a family, I’ll try to have all the values gain equal amounts of attention.

If you had any advice to someone just graduating college or thinking about switching careers, what would it be?

Now’s the time to try new things and do what you like.  You can always make more money and you can always have a steady job as a fall-back.

If someone wanted to do your job, what is important to maintain a position?

You have to be dedicated to educating yourself and have the thick skin to know that a lot of the writing you do is going to suck.  That’ll be in the first 6 months – your work wont be usable or at the level suitable to sell.  A lot of the writing you’ll do in your career wont be sellable.

Also interesting to note is that most English majors actually have a problem getting into sales copy writing, as it ignores a lot of the traditional rules of ‘correct’ writing. What matters more is being a good SALESPERSON. If someone has a 6th grade reading/writing level but is a great salesperson, I’ll hire them over a screenwriter or novelist. So just because you don’t THINK you are a good writer doesn’t mean you can’t be a copywriter. I’m pretty sure I failed at least one English class on my way up!

Who inspires you?

Tim King.  Haha, but really you inspire me to travel that’s for damn sure.

My greatest marketing mentor in the world is Gary Halbert.

Michael Masterson – he’s started several amazing direct marketing companie… love his books and he was kind enough to meet with us and give us some advice which helped us tremendously. “Ready, Fire, Aim” – is the book that introduced him to me and, “Great Leads”, one of his many copywriting books, is also a must-read.

What did you get into the most trouble for when you were young?

I guess I’ve always had a real problem doing homework – which is funny because I have a passion for studying copy writing.

~FUN QUESTIONS~

What did you want to be when you want to be when you grew up?

A circus ringmaster.

What are some of your favorite sounds?

Jack Johnson.  I used to go to his concerts.  The boom of the dynamite exploding inside the wooden man at burning man.

What’s your favorite curse word?

Shitweasel.

What’s your favorite memory from your past? 

Necker island when Richard Branson was there.  Will always be a great memory.  Bungee jumped the Macua tower which is the highest bungee jump in the world.  Had to do a lot of prep for that and I did it extremely well.  Was really happy with myself.

If you were an animal, what kind of animal would you be, and why?

I think I’d be an owl.  Because owls rely more on their wisdom to survive in life that hard physical exertion.  I see an owl as a guy that hangs out in a tree and just sits back, letting other birds come ask him for advice, people asking about tootsie rolls…and if he feels like getting a mouse he’ll go down and do it.

What are some of your favorite smells?

I mean women just smell very good.  I actually like the smell of gasoline and tires.  Sandlewood candles.  You know Victoria’s Secret really just kills it with the perfumes.  You also can’t compare to having an apartment on the sand.

If you were a character in a famous movie, who’s role would you play?

Doc Holliday in the movie Tombstone.

If you could go back to any point in history for a month, what time period would you visit?

I’d go back to Scandinavian origin to see one of my own ancestors in their own element doing some badass shit, ideally some viking shit!

If there was one celebrity you’d like to punch in the face, who would it be?

Chris Brown.

If you had to obtain $1m illegally, how would you do it?

Sell my anal virginity. Wait not sure if anyone would pay for that. I’d kidnap Ryan Seacrest and sell his! Oh wait, he’s probably not an anal virgin. Shit. Next question…

Which long lost childhood object would you most like to find?

I think it’d be amazing to have every favorite shirt you’ve ever had throughout the different times in your life.  Just to look at them all.

What age do people become “old”, what’s the secret to staying young?

When they stop having sex.

What’s your favorite quotation?

“Nothing attracts a crowd like a crowd” by my best friend Phil.

If someone wanted to get in touch with you and ask you more about what it takes to get involved in your career, would you be open to it?

I would if they had FIRST read the Claude Hopkins books, then visited www.TheGaryHalbertLetter.com and read every piece of marketing info on it. Those are the 2 best resources for up and coming writers so unless someone does that they probably aren’t serious about it.

My company is also looking for new writers right now. You are required to work in our LA office, as we feel it’s the best environment to learn. After you prove yourself we are open to you working remotely, but we don’t start anyone remotely… we have to see that they want it. And you can’t beat being surrounded by he team of world-class marketers we’ve assembled. Our new writers get good FAST… my favorite part of my job right now is working with them to improve their skills.

Do you currently do consulting for other businesses?

I consult for non-competitive businesses at the rate of $1000/hr, previous to which I go over all of your marketing materials so the entire 60 minutes is value. I don’t really take on outside copywriting projects anymore.

If you enjoyed this post and think you might know someone else that might be interested in reading, I’d love it if you’d share this with them.

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And out of all the travels I’ve been on, all the things I’ve seen, and all the people I’ve met – the most memorable experiences I’ve had have been the road less traveled, the rare and most surreal sights, and the people who march to the beat of their own drum.

When I came across the Details Matter App, I immediately fell in love with it. I love the mindset behind it, and I thoroughly believe that it makes a genuine attempt of helping people get more out of life. And on top of that, it makes it all so much easier.

And I can’t be more thrilled to help collaborate with such an awesome concept.

So starting March 20th, I’ll be doing the best of my abilities to spread the word to as many people as possible. I’ll be going on 30 dates – with 30 girls – in 30 days straight.

I know. It’s crazy. And impractical. But you know what? A lot of the best adventures I’ve had have been crazy and impractical – and I’m thinking this next month will be one hell of a time!

So here are the “details” in case you’d like to get involved, or maybe just like to follow along:

1. I’ll be going on a different date each day, with a different girl each time. The dates will include activities in or around San Diego that range from about $0 (for some great first date ideas) to upwards of the $300 range towards the end (for more anniversary ideas).

2. I’ll be posting photos of the dates (not necessarily their faces or the two of us, but imagery that tells the story) and you can follow along on the Details Matter Instagram account. Search “@details_matter_app”

3. I’ll also be talking about the date each day on the details matter blog – highlighting the experience in terms of what kind of activity it was, the associated cost, and my opinion on how much potential the girl has for success in life. Just kidding! (The personal details of the date – IE what we talked about, if I was attracted to her or not, etc – aren’t the main focus, but rather talking about how others can go out and make these kind of experiences happen for themselves. If anything, I’m betting the girls that will be up for these adventures will be positive and fun, and those kind of characteristics I always love to talk about. Like I mentioned in the video, I’m not looking for love – I’m not looking to get laid – but rather just share some awesome adventures with some great girls)

4. If you feel like you’d be a good fit and want to join along the experience, I’d love it if you would email me at tim@timkingblog.com. If you don’t live in San Diego or have some friends that you think might be interested, I’d love it if you would share this post on facebook or twitter.

I’m excited for what’s to come – and I can’t wait to share all the fun with you!

It ALSO happens to have earned me a lot of attention on social media, a STRONG relationship with the venue I shot it at, and of course – it’s one of the main images my prospective clients always mention when meeting up at a consult.

I love doing this kind of photography, and I feel it stands out as some of the most compelling styles of imagery you can achieve with your work.

So I’ve decided to entertain the idea of holding a mini-workshop for up to 4 individuals while at WPPI this year.  The conference is timed to be perfectly set for optimal conditions for this kind of photo (new moon) – and the desert outside of Las Vegas will provide for some pretty clear skies.  I think it’s important to have a small group in order to ensure that everyone gets the individual attention they deserve – and it also helps a lot with scheduling.  For now, I’m thinking either Sunday (the 10th), Tuesday, or Wednesday night – whichever works best for the group will dictate it.

The cost would be $200 per person, and here’s what that would cover:

-Transportation to & from the location in the desert during the night of the shoot

-Model male and female provided to create silhouette & various posing options

-Off-camera lighting and tripods provided so you don’t have to worry about bringing your own or having to rent

-Explanation of technique and strategy to achieve this shots – and the conditions that affect how good the shot might be (moon, location, etc) so you’ll know how to prepare yourself in the future

-You’ll leave with a badass shot you can put smack-dab on the front of your portfolio, and if the conditions don’t allow us (clouds, weather)- you’ll get your money back.  I want you to win, and I’m on your team.   If you lose, I lose.  We’re in this together.

I feel strongly about the value in this kind of shot – and I don’t want you walking away feeling like you wasted your time/money on this conference.  I have no doubt in my mind that if for nothing else – this little workshop will give you a huge boost in marketing and helping your brand image.

If you’re interested – please get in touch by sending an email to tim@timkingblog.com

And as always – if you know someone who might be interested in this post – I’d love it if you’d “share” this with them.

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I specifically chose Rico because of how he demonstrates passion for his work.  When he talks about his music and his motivation for doing so, it really shows through.  He also makes an effort to reach out and inspire others in local high schools, and offer bits of inspiration to his followers online.  He also appears to lead a very glamorous and luxurious lifestyle – however I think you’ll find his insight on those issues pretty interesting!

Here’s a photo of us while doing the interview.  We met at my favorite mexican restaurant, Oscars in north Pacific Beach.

Hope you enjoy the interview – and if you know someone who might be interested in Rico’s story – I’d love it if you shared it with them!

What is your name/age?

Rico DeLargo 32 Years Young

What is your occupation?

Musician – Vibe Elevator

Where did you grow up?

Gloucester, VA.  It was awesome.  It was a small town in the countryside with horses in the backyard – like a real country boy.

How long have you been doing what you currently do?

5 years

Did you have a 9-5 job before that?

I did!  It was more like 9-9.  I was directory of entertainment for a lifestyle marketing firm.

How did you become involved in the work that you currently do?

Well, I’ve been perf in nightclubs since I was 16 & 17 years old – now I’m playing alongside DJ’s instead of other musicians.  I started doing that when I was on south beach.  Some Brazilians were throwing some parties and invited me to bring my horn, it was a hit and that’s where it really got ahold.

How much longer do you envision yourself working in the field that you’re in?

1 year, maybe 2.  I love to inspire and motivate people – I feel whatever comes next will involve a great deal of that.  I want to enhance people’s lives in some way.  Vibe elevation in an entirely different spectrum.

What level of schooling have you completed?

Masters.

What is it that you love about your work?

The opportunity to win people over.  What I do is really different and unique.  When I first pull my horn out, people are anticipating something to happen, but they don’t know what.  Winning them over and elevating their vibe with the sound coming from my mind and my heart – truly rewarding.

What is your least favorite thing about your work?

The travel.  Late nights and early flights.  Flying hungover, to put it more bluntly.

Is there anything you miss about life back home?

The tempo.  It’s a slower pace, and I live life in the fast lane right now.  When I go home and get to just go back to that lower gear and unwind

What are some of the advantages of your job compared with the regular corporate career?

I have a lot of control over my schedule – it has a lot of flexibility.  Keeping in touch with friends in different cities and having actual face time with them is pretty sweet.

What are some of the disadvantages compared with the regular corporate career?

Barely see your family.  Inconsistent sleep.  Insomnia.  I had insomnia for a year.  A lot of shallow people in the industry I work in.

How different is the dating scene for you?  Is it easier/harder to make time to be with your significant other?

My schedule is not very conducive for nurturing a relationship.  It’s something I’ll want down the line – more time with someone special.  (This girl is special to me – she’s ions above any other woman in my life.)  I just need more time – I’m never home.  How do you grow a relationship when you’re never around?  It’s like trying to keep a plant without watering it.

Do you tend to prefer to live paycheck to paycheck or with a savings plan accounted for?  Is your income predictable and regular, or entirely dependent on what you produce?

Up until now, paycheck to paycheck was fine.  Now, as I’m getting older – I’m understanding the value of having that little bit tucked away.

Before, it was all about being in the moment – that was all that mattered.  If I could go back and change my approach earlier, I would have.  Take 10% of everything and just put it away.  Not touch it.

How do you imagine your retirement, or lifestyle past 60?

Laying at the beach everyday.  Living an extremely healthy lifestyle.  Being in really great shape, and continuing to help others in some way.  Giving back to the community.  Still trying to inspire young people in a way.

Do you see your career facilitating a lifestyle suitable for a family, or do you have the desire to have a family?

My new dream is to have a family.  I’m learning that my lifestyle isn’t really that condusive to nurturing and sustaining a family the way I would want to.  That’s one of the main reasons I’m looking to change my career within the next 2 years.  I want to take the proper footsteps to allow for a family.  I’d consider a 9-5, but after having my own business for 5 years – I’m not sure that I can work for someone else.  But if I had to in oreder to support my family, I’d do anything.  I’d work at 7-11 if it meant putting food on the table for my family.

What are your top priorities in the ‘big picture’?

Helping others, I think giving is the best way of learning when it comes to that kind of “big picture” and what’s meant to be spirituality.  I think the key is to give whole heartedly and genuinely.  How can I give more?  How can I give more of myself, my knowledge, and a helping hand to other people?  Those are the things I think about.

Learning more about myself.  Evolving as a man.  That’s my priority.  I think about that everyday.  How can I evolve as a man and grow?

If you had any advice to someone just graduating college or thinking about switching careers, what would it be?

Make networking your number 1 priority.  Building and utilizing a network is essential to almost any career or job.  And obtaining a job!

If someone wanted to do your job, what is important to maintain a position?

Confidence.  That’s the biggest thing.  Being comfortable in any situation.

Who inspires you?

My parents.  Nature.  Fuck, that sounds so hippy but it’s true.  The things around me – you know – my surroundings.  And music.  Definitely music.

What do you think of authority?

There were a few instances in my life growing up where I had some trouble with authority.  I tend to be a lone wolf and tend to make my own rules.  That’s why I have an entrepreneurial spirit – that’s where it comes from.  There’s no doubt in my mind that authority figues have tought me a tremendous amount and mentored me to be the person I am today.  As I grew older – I think I realized the value of those above me.  I listended more, and truly – genuinely listened.  Take in what they were saying so I could use it to my advantage.

What did you get into the most trouble for when you were young?

I had detention one time in my whole school career, and it was for talking to girls in class.  I was always very social.

~FUN QUESTIONS~

What did you want to be when you want to be when you grew up?

A baseball player

What are some of your favorite sounds?

Birds – when I’m home in Virginia.  I love thunderstorms too.

What’s your favorite curse word?

Probably fuck, hahaha.

What’s your favorite memory from your past?

I definitely had the most beautiful childhood anyone could ever ask for.  Riding horses and playing baseball, and of course playing music.  Great memories laying on the beach in Miami with my friends.  Great memories of getting home when the sun was coming up in LV.

If you were an animal, what kind of animal would you be, and why?

I’d be a cheetah.  It’s really sexy.  And, it’s fast, but it’s also gentle.

What are some of your favorite smells?

The smell of smoke from a chimney  – reminds me of my childhood.  The street after the rain.  The ocean.

If you were a character in a famous movie, who’s role would you play?

Oh, I would be Tony from Saturday night fever.  Of course.

If you could go back to any point in history for a month, what time period would you visit?

Probably the roman empire when Marcus Airelis was in power.

If there was one celebrity you’d like to punch in the face, who would it be?

I really can’t stand that guy from Magic Mike – what’s his name?

“Channing Tatum” the girl sitting next to us says.  Or maybe that girl from the latest batman.

If you had to obtain $1m illegally, how would you do it?

Something kind of robin hood esc.  Maybe extort a millionaire

Which long lost childhood object would you most like to find?

My big wheel.

What age do people become “old”, what’s the secret to staying young?

100.  Ticket to staying young is juicing.  And avoiding meat.

What’s your favorite quotation?

Believe and it will be.  I’m pretty sure I made it up.

If someone wanted to get in touch with you and ask you more about what it takes to get involved in your career, what would be the best way?

The contact page at RicoDeLargo.com

On a scale of 1-10, how likely are you to get back to them?

10.

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This has been on my mind for awhile now, and I really feel like it’s time to get it out.  There are a few things people are doing on instagram that they believe are helping them…but *I* think they’re actually HURTING THEM!

So let’s get to it, shall we?

1.  HASHTAGS ARE GETTING YOU NOWHERE!

I’ve felt it out, seen the results, and read interviews with people who’re featured on the “popular page” regularly.  And to sum it up, followers from hashtags and the popular page are on average – the LEAST engaged followers and more often end up ‘unfollowing’ at some point anyways.  They don’t know you from Adam, so they feel the *least* compelled to keep you on board.

And now this next point is from *my personal opinion*…but I feel hashtags come across as spam.  You look at a photo and go to read the description…and it’s LOADED FULL with # signs.  Half the experience of photography is understanding the story behind it, and in my opinion – hashtags have no place.  (Unless they’re ironic, funny, intentional play on themselves)

And furthermore, to get a little *deeper into the psyche*…I feel that when your FRIENDS see this on your feed, it comes across as though you’re posting to get the attention of OTHERS, and not *them*.  Who are you posting your content for?  And why are you posting it?

The focus should be on creating engaging content, and I feel that hashtags #distract.

2.  Double sharing on facebook is throwing yourself under the bus.

I might be erring on the extreme on this one, but when I see the same thing twice during my daily stalk – I wonder…what’s the point?

Why am I following them on Instagram if I see the same sh*t on facebook?

*Unfollow*

Sorry to be a jerk, but really – I don’t need to see your stuff twice.  And I’m betting that others feel the same way.

And you know what…?

“Say Facebook ends up going down the Myspace route and people head for the hills and on to something new.”  What will you have left?  An empty instagram because everyone unfollowed you due to your double posting and hashtag calamity.

I know that hashtags definitely do have their value in connecting others, but in my opinion – the experience of the people who *actually do* know me is worth so much more not to bombard them with pound signs.

If you want to discuss or leave a love/hate comment, I’d be happy to hear from you below in the comments.

THANK YOU!

BONUS FUN FACT ABOUT HASHTAGS - for those of you that *absolutely* must have their photo featured in the #selfie gallery, rest assured that you can add hashtags WEEKS after you’ve posted the photo and it will still work the same way!  

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What you didn’t read on facebook – the reasons why I follow and *don’t* follow certain people.

Why I follow you:

-you’ve got interesting content.  Like, REALLY interesting.  I’m talking about a life of adventure or an alternative career…not just expeditions to Potato chip rock on a wednesday.  I like keeping up with the day-to-day of people who lead unique lifestyles.  Sometimes I know them, sometimes they’re still a stranger.

-you’re close to me and I talk to you on a weekly basis.  I like to keep up with people I’m in regular contact with because I can bring up a photo they posted in conversation the next time I talk to them.  If I have a ton of acquaintances on there, it can make it hard to keep up with those I really know and talk to.

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Here’s one of my favorite #selfies, just for the hell of it.

I specifically chose Sherri because of her always-progressing attitude towards work and her openness to helping others.  As I’ve come to find, a lot of times well-established people aren’t always open to sharing their stories of success, and it’s refreshing to see someone that understands an abundance mentality and continues to help others grow.  She has a blog where she shares pointers and how-to videos, and I think it’s incredibly resourceful for anyone looking to grow their skills in her industry.

Here’s a photo of us to give you a visual for the interview – I met her while she was getting her hair done.  Decided to have a little fun and jump in the chair myself.

Hope you enjoy the interview – and if you know someone who might be interested in Sherri’s story – I’d love it if you shared it with them!

What is your name/age?

Sherri Belanger 29

What is your occupation?

Celebrity Hair Stylist

Where did you grow up?

Methuen, Massachusetts

How long have you been doing what you currently do?

10 Years

Did you have a 9-5 job before that?

I’ve actually only had 1 – when I was 15, I did sales at a tanning salon.  It wasn’t 9-5, it was an after school type thing.  Full time hours, but I worked there while in beauty school too.

How did you become involved in the work that you currently do?

Since I was a child, I had a love & obsession with hair.  For me it was never a question in my mind.  As soon as I finished HS, went straight to cosmetology school.  I had really bad hair when I was little, and I think that might have been what inspired me.

How much longer do you envision yourself working in the field that you’re in?

One day I feel like I may be a salon owner, however I’ll always be involved in hair care in some way.

What level of schooling have you completed?

I received my cosmetology license after HS.  1600 hours of schooling, it took me about a year and 2 months because I had a job as well.

What is it that you love about your work?

First and foremost I love people – I love getting to know them & making them feel good, helping them bring their inner most beauty out through their hair, helping them find their inner confidence through that, getting creative with styling, and the relationship you build with clients is amazing.

What is your least favorite thing about your work?

Our job can be very physically demanding.  You can stand up to 10 hours a day, barely have any time for a break or to use the bathroom.  It can take a lot out of you.

Is there anything you miss about life back home?

My family of course.  I love the east coast and the kind of people.  I moved here when I was 13 because my parents wanted to offer us more opportunity and get away from the snow.   At the time is was most devastating, but in turn became the biggest blessing.

What are some of the advantages of your job compared with the regular corporate career?

I can make my own schedule, essentially it’s up to me how much money I want to make.

I can be creative in how I look (hair makeup) while on the job,  if I want to take a month off to travel – I can.

If I wanna work 15 hrs/day 7 day/week I can.

It’s never the same thing everyday, and the people along the way can change your life - people open up about very personal things and share their life lessons…and through them I can learn as well.

What are some of the disadvantages compared with the regular corporate career?

Job security, we have to pay for our own medical benefits – there’s no guarantee that we’ll have future business.

Nothing is ever just going to come to you – you have to work really hard in order to sustain and achieve success.  No sick days or 401K, work late nights/early mornings, Saturdays/weekends, sometimes an important client wants their hair done at 5 AM.  The advantages totally outweight these though.

How different is the dating scene for you?  Is it easier/harder to make time to be with your significant other?

It can be easier for sure – once you are successful and have the option for weekend getaways you definitely can.  It doesn’t start that way, but it can snowball into that.  You get to meet a lot of people that want to set you up, so it’s a total advantage really.

Do you tend to prefer to live paycheck to paycheck or with a savings plan accounted for?  

I love saving money.  I’ve always put away money and liked to have a savings account – we also have to pay taxes in one big chunk during the year so we have to have a lot saved up for that.

How do you imagine your retirement, or lifestyle past 60?

Not sure if I’ll still be ‘doing hair’, but hopefully at that time I’ll own a really successful kickass salon somewhere in San Diego.  I’ll continue to have my hands in it.  There will never be a moment that I wont be passionate about hair and beauty.

Do you see your career facilitating a lifestyle suitable for a family, or do you have the desire to have a family?

Yes.  100%  Hair dressers make their own schedule.  You can choose to work only 3 days/week – it’s a business that allows you to be completely in control of your life.  It’s very likely to just work 4 hrs per day and make a substantial amount of money.

Truthfully, it starts out with a very humble beginning.  A lot of hair stylists have to move back home and put in a lot of work investing in yourself and your skill.  It’s kind of a slow, snowball effect and it takes time.  I don’t know any stylists that were making 6 figures in their first few years.  You can make it happen for sure, but you gotta work really hard.  A lot of stylists first start out with a part time job in addition to styling.

What are your top priorities in the ‘big picture’?

Making an impact in someway – helping people in any way that I can.  Making people feel good.

I love traveling and I want to have a family.  Being healthy, happy, and just living each day to the fullest – doing things that make me feel good.  Success is really just what you make of it.  Money’s not everything, but I just want to make enough to live comfortably.

If you had any advice to someone just graduating college or thinking about switching careers, what would it be?

If you have something itching inside of you to possibly be a hairstylist and make it a career – but you have a fear that you wont make money or people will criticize your decision, I think you have to ask yourself what the worst case scenario could be.  Not making money?  Starting over?  Not like it & find another job?  Ask yourself if you can handle that…and if so – go for it.   You can be super successful and make tons of money if you really want it.  There was a time when I was younger when I thought I wouldn’t make much money doing hair, and that was my mindset of what success was at the time – and I almost didn’t pursue it.

If someone wanted to do your job, what is important to maintain a position?

You have to be willing to put the time in and work hard – not expect things to be given to you.  Advanced training classes, hair shows, salons offer education, I started as an assistant – went to NYC to study at Bumble and Bumble about 8 times, the salon I started at required me to go to classes 2x a week and do photo shoots.  Early on set the tone for what it’d be like later.  Social media marketing.  Doing excellent service.  Keeping cutting edge.  Doing the most beautiful hair ever.  And put your heart into it.  It’s not just about getting their hair done, but making them feel pampered and relaxed & that they’re getting their money’s worth.

Who inspires you?

Passionate, positive people, individuals that don’t give up and believe in themselves.  Find the good in bad situations.

What do you think of authority?

Ha, I have a guilty conscience if I do bad things, but I definitely agree that some rules were meant to be broken.

What did you get into the most trouble for when you were young?

Probably talking too much in school.  I think I talked a lot.  I’d get grounded from the phone as a recurring punishment.  Sometimes I’d eat my packed lunch during class.  I loved to eat.

~FUN QUESTIONS~

What did you want to be when you want to be when you grew up?

Dorothy from the wizard of oz – I loved her pigtails.

What are some of your favorite sounds?

The ocean.  Sitting in a jungle.  Bamboo hitting bamboo.

What’s your favorite curse word?

I probably drop F bombs a lot, is that bad?  I don’t do it at work, but I kind of cuss a lot, haha.

If you were an animal, what kind of animal would you be, and why?

A monkey.  I just love monkeys so much.

What are some of your favorite smells?

I love the smell of the leaves in New England during the fall.  The smell of Gardenias and lilacs – we used to have lilacs at my house growing up, so I love that.

If you were a character in a famous movie, who’s role would you play?

I’d be aerial in Little Mermaid, she had great hair.

If you could go back to any point in history for a month, what time period would you visit?

I’d love to visit when my parents were teens during the mid 70’s, rocking hippy hair and bell bottoms.  I think it’d be incredible to live in that and experience that kind of era – a permanent party.

If you had to obtain $1m illegally, how would you do it?

Taking a Vegas casino by counting cards.

Which long lost childhood object would you most like to find?

When I moved from Mass – SD, my friends would write me letters.  I’d have anything from 1-5 letters each day.  For whatever reason my family moved a few times…and in the process my letters got lost.  I found a lot of strength in those letters.

What age do people become “old”, what’s the secret to staying young?

I think you’re never old – it’s all in your mind.  Your body might break but you don’t have to succomn to it…maintaining the young mindset is what it takes.

What’s your favorite quotation?

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those that mind don’t matter and those that matter don’t mind.

If someone wanted to get in touch with you and ask you more about what it takes to get involved in your career, what would be the best way?

Sure!  They can get in touch via my Facebook business page.

On a scale of 1-10, how likely are you to get back to them?

10

We’ve all been to that point in a relationship where things get a little stagnant.  (Usually it occurs around the 6 month to 1 year mark)  And after awhile of putting your best foot forward trying to win her heart over and make a great impression, you realize you’ve got her.  She’s yours.  And you are hers.

And with that, we get tempted to relax a little bit – we don’t need to put forth so much effort into winning affection because we’re both secure & comfortable in knowing that we’re in it together now.

But here’s the thing…while you were busy getting her roses and treating her to romantic and creative nights out on the town – what do you think was going on in her head?

It sets the expectation for what the future is going to be like with you.

And what happens when you decide to stop putting forth so much effort to try to win her over and impress her?

She’ll think you don’t care…or maybe that you’re not as interested as you used to be.  And that’s not cool.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard couples complain that the other doesn’t recognize the things they do for each other or that they don’t show appreciation.

But guess what ladies?  It works both ways!

Of course it’s more comfortable to wear ugg boots and throw your hair up in a sock bun.

And of course it’s more comfortable to stay in and order pizza while playing Halo 3 in your gym shorts.

But as you could probably guess – those aren’t the most exciting nights we’ll experience.

Now I’m not saying that you can’t do these things and you shouldn’t be completely comfortable in front of one another – what I’m getting at is that vigor and that passion that came through in the first few months…what happened to it?

Well…I suppose it fades over time with the lack of needing to “win each other over”.

You want to know how you can rekindle that feeling…without having to go to all the extra effort and energy?

FLIRT.

I don’t mean “hit on her” and spank her ass while she’s doing the dishes.  (But don’t dismiss the idea completely – some girls love that kind of thing)

What I want to encourage is the idea of being playful.  It doesn’t take much effort to have a little fun with someone randomly throughout the day – and it actually makes a HUGE difference in their attitude.

Try it.  Have fun.  Play a prank on them.  It might come as a surprise after so much time of being predictable…but once you start it…

IT’S ON.

And trust me – it will add a whole new element to your day and to your LIFE that will make it much more enjoyable.

Make a funny impression of her.  Give her a nickname.  Text her funny pictures that remind you of her in a silly way during the day.  Make fun of her in a playful way. Wrestle her and pin her to the ground, and do the hanging spit thing you’d do to your sister growing up.  (She’ll hate it, but it’s fun as hell for us)

Girls – throw on some heels and do your hair just for the hell of it, wake him up with that special alarm clock that nothing else can compare to, and if you REALLY want to make him feel like a man – have a conversation with a friend over the phone just loud enough for him to hear and brag about something he’s done recently.  You can bet your sweet ass he’ll be more inclined to do it again.

On another note – I interviewed a guy for an upcoming “Case of the Fridays” post and he responded to the question of when do people get old – with the most original response I’ve heard yet – “when they stop having sex”.  Hit the nail on the head.

Point is with this post – a lot of times we get caught up thinking “why aren’t they doing things for me like when we first started dating?”  And we jump to conclusions that make the relationship seem unfulfilling.

But don’t let your mind go there – instead…let your mind think about how you can make her life more enjoyable and more fun.

Yeah, maybe she WON’T understand it.  Maybe she won’t appreciate it at first.  But she’ll notice you’re making an effort.  You’re thinking about HER, and making it a point to have fun WITH HER.

And in reality…when you REALLY think about it…she is the most important person in your life!  Show her that she is.  (Could you imagine your life without her?)

I have a pretty good feeling it will end up well for you – not just the end of the night but your time with each other as a whole.

It might take being the bigger person, and realize that the world isn’t always going to recognize the effort you put forth – and a lot of times you’ll end up unrewarded.  But that doesn’t change the fact that you add enjoyment to their life on a daily basis.  And THAT is where the motivation should come from.

So go have some fun.  Surprise her.  Do something spontaneous.  Surprise her with some costumes one night and get weird together.  Yeah that’s right!  Get weird together, she’ll love it.

Happy Valentines Day

PS – this is a photo from an engagement session I shot in Santa Monica a few months ago – here’s Jenn smashing a cupcake into her fiance’s face.  I feel it shows the kind of playfulness people should embrace and take lightheartedly!

PPS – this doesn’t just apply to couples.  Flirting with people and just generally having playful fun with anyone will do wonders for your overall attitude in life.

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If you want to do something and feel like ‘society standards’ would frown upon it or it would be looked at as ‘weird’ or ‘uncool’ – you have to question *who* you’re living your life for. What others think? Hell-to-the-no. You do what you want, when you want. “Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
 

Be a leader of “yourself” and others will be inspired to do the same.  And it’s refreshing as hell to lead a life of doing exactly what you want without influence from others.  I suggest you try it and let me know how it feels.

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Here’s a few bonus photos of me being weird just for the fun of it:

This was a holiday card I made this past December.  Again, tried to tell people the concept – thought I was weird.  Once they saw this masterpiece they immediately understood.

I had to ask a friend if I should include this next photo.  I asked her, “Fire jumping’s not weird, is it?”

She responded, “Tim – it is weird.  I think you just have a skewed perception of normal.”

A ninja costume themed pub crawl my friend James held a couple years ago.

On Halloween of this past year, I spent the evening working on my website with my friend Jason.

Drove around with this Peruvian mask on in my car during the day for the hell of it.

Every time I visit my dad, we play racquetball at the college gym. He usually beats me in a lopsided victory.  One time I visited and beat him by a good amount of points.

And…it just so happened that the school was doing a fundraiser $10 portrait day for kids in the art school to go to a photography conference. I figured what BETTER way to remember this day in history than to get a portrait of myself right after the game!

Now, my dad will have this portrait to haunt his dreams of the day that I viciously destroyed him in racquetball.  

Dressing up just for the hell of making the photo *that* much better.

My friend Julia trains horses, and invited me up to her ranch to go riding one day.

Again, made it more fun by playing the part.

Halloween weekend was super foggy.  Decided to get out some monster gloves I had in my prop storage and have some fun with backlighting with my buddy Matt.

Had a really long layover in the Gangzhou airport on my way to snorkel in Indonesia.  Decided to get my gear out and have some fun.

I chose Chris because well, ONE – he has one of the most interesting careers based off an industry that has just been CREATED in the past decade (there is a lot to learn in this area for sure!) and TWO – he’s incredibly inspiring.  I’ve seen clips from his viewers like this one where fans tell how he’s inspired them to be confident and how his videos have made a difference in their lives.  While maintaining a large following, he keeps things personal and engaging with his followers – and I love the fact that he’s just so AUTHENTIC.

Without further adue, here’s the interview (and a creative pic for you to have as a visual of our conversation while we met up in LA).  I realize this photo makes me look like I have a black eye – during the interview I asked a question that Chris was HIGHLY offended by and he delivered a swift jab to my right eye.  (Just kidding, although Chris did mention that he is a very good fighter if there was ever a damsel in distress that needed his help.)

What is your name/age?

Chris Thompson – 31

What is your occupation?

YouTube Partner

Where did you grow up?

Mostly in Chicago, lived in NJ for 5 years. I moved to LA in 2003, which was before the big YouTube boom.

At first I had quite a bit of culture shock!  I was from a suburb, so I’d never been exposed to a big city before – I was a suburban kid.  The peeps out here are kind of a trip, not the type I was used to in Chicago suburbs.

I was tempted to go back home several times. I’m very close to my family – I love being around them, but I always end up staying – at this point, the opportunity out here, the weather – it’s just to great for me to pass up.  Chicago weather sucks.

With the way youtube is going, you have to be here. You have to be available for opportunities on a moments notice in the LA area. For example, pilot episodes for shows dedicated soley to youtube – they’re all location dependent and the majority are in LA.

How long have you been doing what you currently do?

I started my channel 6 years ago.  Never really took it seriously before, and now February I’ll be doing it 2 years full time. I was always distracted by a lot of things (“life” can be distracting) – it really takes up your entire day to really do it full time.  I went through a relationship and ended that, quit my job, and moved back home for a fresh start.

When I started out, I was only making $100/mo from Youtube. I had $3k to my name when I moved out here, and I had to stretch that as much as possible. I researched *everything I could* to be the best, and just FOCUSED and got the ball rolling.

Did you have a 9-5 job before that?

I was a PA for awhile on music videos. Worked on videos with Fergie, Usher, a lot of R&B videos – really helped groom me for what I’m doing now. But it was like 18 hr days.

How did you become involved in the work that you currently do?

It was an accident. I was on myspace, and I saw a video with the YouTube watermark and realized you can embed videos. I had a video of my dad & I doing DDR at an arcade – I wanted to put it on myspace for friends to see. I used my email address and posted the video, then I saw I was getting comments, ratings, etc and it piqued my curiosity.  At that point people weren’t really doing it for money, just doing it to be creative.  At the time I didn’t even know how to transfer files off of a camera.  Started looking into the community idea on YouTube, and decided to make a video solely for Youtube and people viewing – got some comments to encourage me to make more videos and I made a parody video about some of the more well known creators and it took off.

I actually started getting a bunch of messages from this french girl (I had to use google to translate them) and kept seeing the link to my YouTube channel at the bottom.  Apparently some guy tried to act like he was me and had been stealing my photos – putting them on his page, and trying to seduce her.  YouTube put the story on it’s front page and I went from 500-5000 subscribers in one week.

In the beginning it was a fun community that wasn’t tainted by money, people want to be popular and belong.  Now a lot of them have let the popularity or money go to their head and it’s affected the atmosphere.

Have you ever had any issues with psycho stalkers or obsessed fans?  

I used to work on my stuff at a coffee shop and I’d check in there.  Fans would show up, and it would just feel a little disconcerting.  Some friends on YouTube have told me that people have showed at their house, sometimes blogs that didn’t like an individual would post their personal info, credit card info getting stolen, & fbi would have to get involved to fix the situation.

How much longer do you envision yourself working in the field that you’re in?

I don’t know really, I don’t really have a time limit on it – it’s really just dove tailed and I’m faithful that this YouTube thing will lead me into my next thing.

YouTube has taught me a lot about video production and SEO. I’d definitely consider consulting for aspiring youtube.  I’ve been all over speaking on channels on building an online brand.  A lot of it seems common sense to me, but it’s been so long that I’ve been involved that I forget most people don’t understand the dynamic of it all.

A lot of people just try to copycat others, they don’t produce genuine content of what they really want to do. Inconsistency. Imagine your channel like a regular TV show.

The internet is one of the most brutally honest places – people hide behind that anonymity and feel comfortable being completely honest.

What level of schooling have you completed?

High School. I went to college for a couple years & got scouted by a record label on the East Coast – boy band at 19, and that was my first Hollywood lesson. Just cause you have a deal doesn’t mean you’ve “made it”.  I decided at one point that I just needed to get out here.  So I worked 19 doubles in a row at Benningans (where I worked at the time) and moved to LA.

What is it that you love about your work?

I love that I can affect people on a global level from my bedroom. Some of my fan-mail comes from people all over the world, telling me how much they look up to me – seeing that I can have a positive change on people is amazing.

There was an incident that happened a few months ago where I got into an online argument with a girl about gay rights – people who oppose it really don’t budge and often don’t listen. It was really cool to see her come back months later and say she realized she had been ignorant.  It’s amazing to see that kind of change in someone and be a part of it.

When I was at a YouTube conference (Bitcon), this 13 yr old girl hobbles over with a cane, shows a friendship bracelet she made while in the hospital and told me, “your videos were the only thing that made me smile while I was in the hospital getting back surgery.  Stuff like that is so humbling, and so awesome. It’s pretty amazing.

Being your own boss doesn’t suck.

I also really like how I can engage with people.  Others’ channels are more of a ‘show’, while mine is more of a conversation.

What is your least favorite thing about your work?

It’s verrrry time consuming. 60-80 hrs of work, but it really doesn’t seem like it because I love doing it.

I really don’t like how popularity and money has changed certain people.  It’s become less and less about community, but that’s kind of how things go. Money brings out a different side of people.

Have you ever felt discouraged from haters or felt negatively influenced by others to quit pursuing your job?

Yeah. Because the internet is so anonomous, people say some really harsh stuff – “you’re worthless, talentless, go die in a hole”.  You have to have really thick skin.  It’s usually people that have nothing to contribute that are saying this stuff.  Just people that want to bring others down.

A lot of it is kids – primary audience is 13-17 on YouTube, so you can’t really blame them – they don’t have a completely developed grasp on how their words affect people.

What are some of the advantages of your job compared with the regular corporate career?

I do what I want…the activities of the day are entirely up to me.  My own vision.  Unadulterated.

Would you say it’s pretty crucial to have an open mind doing what you do?

Totally – you spend so much time building the audience, there’s definitely a value. It can’t all be about money, you just have to do things just to do them based off the pure value of the experience.  Recognize the full benefits of whatever you’re getting yourself involved with.

What are some of the disadvantages compared with the regular corporate career?

If you are not driven, there’s no one to push you or tell you what to do. You gotta drive yourself and figure out what you need to do. If you don’t have hustle, then what are you doing?

How different is the dating scene for you? Is it easier/harder to make time to be with your significant other?

I’ve always been a firm believer in making time to be with someone.

What do they say about your line of work?

People still don’t have the respect for what YouTube really is.  They don’t recognize it as an industry, and that it is a career.  It’s something that takes a lot of time and dedication for.

Sometimes I have to flake on meeting up because of something that might seem silly to them.

They don’t understand the fans. I have girls proposing marriage on my videos, and they don’t understand the dynamic and what that kind of thing really is. It’s not like everyone else’s facebook account – I have to engage with those kind of fans and it’s not because I want to hook up with them.  After I respond and show my audience that I care – that might cause them to go to itunes and download my song, share my YouTube account, etc.

You gotta find someone that gets it.

What are typical conversations like between you and other youtube partners?

There’s always the business aspect of it because of all the collaboration. Sometimes you can kinda tell if people are trying to get to your audience, etc. We all really talk about the topics that affect us as a community.

Do you have an end goal in line in regards to film/video/music? Or are you just going where the wind blows?

You always have to think about the future. Doing the acapella videos are really inspiring. I hate video editing, but I could sit & edit a piece of music for hours. It’d be really cool to do that for other artists and bring out their potential to the best it could be.

I don’t have an obsession to be in front of the camera, it just so happens that I’ve built a brand around a personality and that avenue is video.

What does your family think of your work?

My family is awesome. They all subscribe to my YouTube, they’re on twitter. My mom has a picture of me on her HS teachers desk and tells her students about her son – the “internet sensation”. My dad calls and comments about things I’ve put up, offer feedback.

One time I was in a rap battle, my parents went out and got materials to build me a cool looking set so I could make a video.

Do you tend to prefer to live paycheck to paycheck or with a savings plan accounted for? Is your income predictable and regular, or entirely dependent on what you produce?

The money on youtube is so inconsistent – sometimes you put away money when you can.  Sometimes things just don’t get seen, and you just have to keep going.

For any people out there that think it’s a windfall of money – good luck!

How do you imagine your retirement, or lifestyle past 60?

I don’t – right now I’m just trying to figure out my place. I’m not worried about it, I’m above no job.  I’ll find my way.

Do you see your career facilitating a lifestyle suitable for a family, or do you have the desire to have a family?

I have the desire to have a family, and because the income is so inconsistent – it kind of weighs on me at times.

Life takes you crazy places. My original plan was to be a choir teacher in the Midwest.  I just keep hustling and trust that whatever I do will grow.  I want to be a provider for sure.

What are your top priorities in the ‘big picture’?

I do want to travel. I’d love to find a way to travel & work. If I could find some kind of brand-integration deal that took me overseas, that’d be awesome.

You spend so much time in your room working on this stuff – I want to go out and see stuff.

If you had any advice to someone just graduating college or thinking about switching careers, what would it be?

If you’re changing your path – realize it will take a lot of sacrafice –you have to be okay with that.  When I quit bartending to do YouTube full time, I rolled the dice – I could have landed on my ass flat broke. Realize it will take time to make yourself secure.

Who inspires you?

My dad – he didn’t have the upbringing that I did, he had to work really hard and overcome adversity to be the successful man that he came to be. He could have sat and wallowed in his own issues. It’s a choice – and he chose to do better.  It’s admirable in any walk of life.

Mystery Guitar Man – Joe Penna. He’s my best friend. He’s a YouTube guy, has 2m subscribers, does 2 videos a week – he worked his butt off and went from a studio apartment to a house in the hills. I’m so proud of that kid. He’s a prime example of someone that finds something they love to do and does it well – you’ll be rewarded for it.

What do you think of authority?

I’m one who follows the rules for the most part. I bend rules sometimes. I’m kind of one that tends to play it safe. People set those rules for a reason. It’s disrespectful to go in someone’s place and just frankly disobey the standards they’ve set up.

What did you get into the most trouble for when you were young?

I think I was 6 or 7 yrs old, I was in my parents minivan and was playing around – hit the car into neutral, the van rolled down the driveway across the cul de sac and hit the side of the neighbors house. I think I’m still grounded.

~FUN QUESTIONS~

What did you want to be when you want to be when you grew up?

3 things – singer, sharp shooter for the CIA, and a meteorologist.

What are some of your favorite sounds?

Laughter for sure. The sound people make when they’re talking to their dogs to make their heads tilt.

What’s your favorite curse word?

I love the word Cunt – it’s so powerful. Starts with a CUH…and Unggg. Way more powerful than fuck.

What’s your favorite memory from your past? 

My dad’s a work-a-holic, when I was a kid – he would come home from work in his suit, I’d get in this wagon, and we’d ride in it together down the driveway each day he came home from work.

If you were an animal, what kind of animal would you be, and why?

I’d be a dog. I don’t think that’s a bad thing – all men are dogs.

What are some of your favorite smells?

I love women’s perfume and my audience knows this. My PO Box is the most fragrant thing in the world. It’s funny – letters from fans are distracting while I edit.

If you were a character in a famous movie, who’s role would you play?

Mogley in the jungle book. I was a climber when I was a kid – playing with animals, climbing trees and just chilling out. And not wearing pants.

If you could go back to any point in history for a month, what time period would you visit?

I’d go back to when that jesus was around – just clear some stuff up and write a book about it. Real Deal Jesus.

If there was one celebrity you’d like to punch in the face, who would it be?

I wouldn’t punch anyone to be honest. But those people create balance in this world.

If you had to obtain $1m illegally, how would you do it?

I’d probably steal it from the government somehow. Hidden gold bars or something.

Which long lost childhood object would you most like to find?

I took part in a candy bar selling competition when I was in grade school, and there was a killer prize of a brand new bicycle. I got the bike, rode it all the time – rode to school one day and someone just destroyed it.  I had a broken arm when I was selling those bars and I worked so hard for it.  Really sucked to see it get messed up by somebody.

What age do people become “old”, what’s the secret to staying young?

Never. They become old when their brain gets old. My dad’s 60 and people think he’s in his 30’s because he’s sharp, ya know.

My great grandma was a card shark and would talk smack.

Doing YouTube stuff keeps me around the young scene – keeps me feeling young.

What’s your favorite quotation?

“Success is not a result of spontaneous combustion – you must set yourself on fire.”

If someone wanted to get in touch with you and ask you more about what it takes to get involved in your career, what would be the best way?

Twitter or Facebook – Twitter.com/supricky06 and Facebook.com/supricky06

On a scale of 1-10, how likely are you to get back to them?

7, if they keep it to the point

PS – here’s an example of one of Chris’ most recent videos to see a sample of what he does.  Hope you enjoy!

If you got a lot out of this article & think you might know others that would as well, I’d love it if you’d tweet/share on facebook.

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